Tweets

    5000letters:

    i find it so incredibly attractive when someone is really good at something, like you can play the violin? damn son. you’re a really talented dj? good for you! i don’t care if you talk to me about quantum physics for an hour straight if i can see the passion in you at some point in that hour i’ll think “whoa, this is really hot.” 

    The Day of your Wedding
    • Bride: OMG why is that centrepiece tilted 0.000004% the wrong way
    • Bride: I hope they didn't mess up the food
    • Bride: OMG LOOK AT MUMMA AND PUPPA OMG DON'T CRY
    • Bride: OMG she's trying to out dress me on MY WEDDING what the Jahannam
    • Bride: I didn't even invite you
    • Bride: Hate that aunty
    • Bride: i can't even eat this crap what the hell my stomach hurts ugh i bet i look ugly in all these pictures
    • Bride: Why is he looking at her?! I'm the wife HELLO
    • Bride: omg there were supposed to be 256 flowers on the cake but i only counted 255
    • Bride: i need some tylenol. and a bed.
    • Groom: Gonna get laid tonight, Alhamdulillah

    neoliberalismkills:

    Do you ever get into an argument with someone and find yourself unable to speak for a moment because you’re just so blown away by how utterly wrong and ignorant the other person is being and you can’t understand how anyone could actually believe the things they are saying

    (Source: neoliberalismkills)